I walked around in the blistering heat of New Delhi for almost 2hrs trying to find a room.
I was feeling so dam sorry for myself and I was feeling angry with myself too for being so stubborn if I had kept my big trap shut and not been so childish I would now be tucked up in a nice bed after a nice shower with a gorgeous man from Nepal. As it was I was filthy head to toe, sad, depressed, tired and lonely.
The rooms I viewed were all terrible. Dusty, dirty, stains on the sheets and I just wanted to cry.
In the end due to pure exhaustion I checked into a hotel called Lord Krishna and it was only because of the name that I checked in surly I would be safe in a place named after Lord Krishna.
The manager was asleep on the reception with his dusty sandals on the counter and when he woke up I wish he hadn't because he talked only to my western boobs.
I was so tired and fed up that I paid the old perv for the dusty dirty room and made my way up the 5 flights of stairs.
I unpacked my bag and was so glad that I had invested in a bed sheet and pillow case in Goa because there was no way I could lie down on what the bed was covered in at the moment, I would raise in the morning, bitten, pregnant and scabied.
I had a shower in the dirty bathroom with tears running down my sad face.
I think this is why I have been single for so long. If you stay alone and don't get involved with anyone then you don't get hurt. I just wanted a little bit of happiness some company some love and now look what had happened. I was not lonely before Mr Nepal came along so why did I feel lonely now? I hate that feeling of missing someone, of needing someone, I like being strong and independent, when I have feelings for someone it makes me feel weak and vulnerable and I hate that feeling.
I decided to brave the outdoors and believe me every time you step outside your door in New Delhi you are dicing with death.
New Delhi is like no where else I have experienced on earth. It is so hot and so dusty that your nose and mouth are constantly filled with dust. The streets stink of sewage and urine and how people actually buy food from the food stalls on the streets I will never know. I was stepping over rats the size of Yorkshire terriers and was surrounded by thousands of flies buzzing around the muck and squalor. But some how I liked it. I know that sounds crazy but I loved the energy of the place. I loved the way that every square foot of filth was filled with life and noise and action and colour. Every where I looked were faces, happy, sad, angry, every emotion possible happening a thousand times over in the same place.
I was stunned by the noise the constant horns blowing and within ten minutes I had been elbowed in the back by a very large Indian woman in a beautiful Sari, head butted by a cow and almost ran over by a rickshaw.
I decided to go back to my room which was a depressing thought. What was I going to do in Delhi? I had no idea what to see or where to go and again I thought what a twat I had been. Mr Nepal had lived in India for 11 years and had traveled the entire country and I knew I would have seen so much with him and we would have had so much fun.
I knew I had just discovered more about myself that I needed to work on and change. My own insecurities and childishness and stubbornness had created my unhappiness.
Once back in the room my dark mood did not lift I only felt worse encased in those unwelcoming walls. I felt so bad with how I had behaved. Mr Nepal and his business partner had been so good to me. Taking care of me, carrying my bag always paying for me for food and drinks and I had thrown it all back in their faces. I felt rotten.
So I decided to send Mr Nepal a text message just to apologise. I didn't mind if he didn't answer I would completely understand if he didn't. I just wanted to say sorry. I didn't call as I thought he may hang up on me so I just sent the text message and hoped he could forgive me.
I felt so much better once I had sent it and I decided that I would have an early night and the next day I would go through the Rough Guide and work out what attractions I wanted to see in and around Delhi and get myself back on track.
Within half and hour the gorgeous Mr Nepal called me and said he wanted to see me. I was so chuffed and it was crazy because he was stopping in the hotel right next door so we met up outside and we both burst out laughing because we both knew how silly we had been.
Later after a lovely dinner and a long chat he walked me to my hotel and we had a sneaky hug away from the prying eyes and arranged to move into the same hotel the next day.
So the romance was back on, all was forgiven but lessons had been learned and I was so grateful that I had a chance to put things right. Mr Nepal had a 'Delhi Schedule' planned out for us, taking in the temples and mosques and the Red Fort so I was excited and relieved that everything was ok again
So off I went to sleep happy and at peace in my dusty room in New Delhi. What a shocker of a day and all down to silliness. I was determined there was going to be no more of that behavior from now on.
I was feeling so dam sorry for myself and I was feeling angry with myself too for being so stubborn if I had kept my big trap shut and not been so childish I would now be tucked up in a nice bed after a nice shower with a gorgeous man from Nepal. As it was I was filthy head to toe, sad, depressed, tired and lonely.
The rooms I viewed were all terrible. Dusty, dirty, stains on the sheets and I just wanted to cry.
In the end due to pure exhaustion I checked into a hotel called Lord Krishna and it was only because of the name that I checked in surly I would be safe in a place named after Lord Krishna.
The manager was asleep on the reception with his dusty sandals on the counter and when he woke up I wish he hadn't because he talked only to my western boobs.
I was so tired and fed up that I paid the old perv for the dusty dirty room and made my way up the 5 flights of stairs.
I unpacked my bag and was so glad that I had invested in a bed sheet and pillow case in Goa because there was no way I could lie down on what the bed was covered in at the moment, I would raise in the morning, bitten, pregnant and scabied.
I had a shower in the dirty bathroom with tears running down my sad face.
I think this is why I have been single for so long. If you stay alone and don't get involved with anyone then you don't get hurt. I just wanted a little bit of happiness some company some love and now look what had happened. I was not lonely before Mr Nepal came along so why did I feel lonely now? I hate that feeling of missing someone, of needing someone, I like being strong and independent, when I have feelings for someone it makes me feel weak and vulnerable and I hate that feeling.
I decided to brave the outdoors and believe me every time you step outside your door in New Delhi you are dicing with death.
New Delhi is like no where else I have experienced on earth. It is so hot and so dusty that your nose and mouth are constantly filled with dust. The streets stink of sewage and urine and how people actually buy food from the food stalls on the streets I will never know. I was stepping over rats the size of Yorkshire terriers and was surrounded by thousands of flies buzzing around the muck and squalor. But some how I liked it. I know that sounds crazy but I loved the energy of the place. I loved the way that every square foot of filth was filled with life and noise and action and colour. Every where I looked were faces, happy, sad, angry, every emotion possible happening a thousand times over in the same place.
I was stunned by the noise the constant horns blowing and within ten minutes I had been elbowed in the back by a very large Indian woman in a beautiful Sari, head butted by a cow and almost ran over by a rickshaw.
I decided to go back to my room which was a depressing thought. What was I going to do in Delhi? I had no idea what to see or where to go and again I thought what a twat I had been. Mr Nepal had lived in India for 11 years and had traveled the entire country and I knew I would have seen so much with him and we would have had so much fun.
I knew I had just discovered more about myself that I needed to work on and change. My own insecurities and childishness and stubbornness had created my unhappiness.
Once back in the room my dark mood did not lift I only felt worse encased in those unwelcoming walls. I felt so bad with how I had behaved. Mr Nepal and his business partner had been so good to me. Taking care of me, carrying my bag always paying for me for food and drinks and I had thrown it all back in their faces. I felt rotten.
So I decided to send Mr Nepal a text message just to apologise. I didn't mind if he didn't answer I would completely understand if he didn't. I just wanted to say sorry. I didn't call as I thought he may hang up on me so I just sent the text message and hoped he could forgive me.
I felt so much better once I had sent it and I decided that I would have an early night and the next day I would go through the Rough Guide and work out what attractions I wanted to see in and around Delhi and get myself back on track.
Within half and hour the gorgeous Mr Nepal called me and said he wanted to see me. I was so chuffed and it was crazy because he was stopping in the hotel right next door so we met up outside and we both burst out laughing because we both knew how silly we had been.
Later after a lovely dinner and a long chat he walked me to my hotel and we had a sneaky hug away from the prying eyes and arranged to move into the same hotel the next day.
So the romance was back on, all was forgiven but lessons had been learned and I was so grateful that I had a chance to put things right. Mr Nepal had a 'Delhi Schedule' planned out for us, taking in the temples and mosques and the Red Fort so I was excited and relieved that everything was ok again
So off I went to sleep happy and at peace in my dusty room in New Delhi. What a shocker of a day and all down to silliness. I was determined there was going to be no more of that behavior from now on.
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